God reminded my heart on our recent Women’s Renewal Getaway Retreat that He didn’t need my help. And for a HELPER like me, this was not the message I wanted to embrace. Let me back up…A little over a year ago I was honored to join a terrific group of women in planning for 
the Fall Getaway. It was a treat to be with women who love God and love other women as we prayed over and dreamed about events over the year that would bless and minister to PRC women and those outside at Pulpit Rock Church. Last year I sent out surveys to assign rooms at registration and handled an acorn craft. I felt okay jumping in and helping in that way. When retreat planning started this past summer for our Fall 2024 getaway, I was open to being involved even more. Our topic of “Rewilding our Relationship with God” began to evolve, and we had a speaker lined up, and things were moving along.
The week of retreat we learned that our speaker had to cancel. We quickly moved to “pivot” and shifted our breakout sessions and talks so that our retreat planning group could cover the gaps. I volunteered to take more of a role in sharing on Saturday morning. Then as the days crept on, I started to panic. “What was I thinking saying I would do this?” “I need to meet with the other speakers and we need to coordinate so we all know what we are saying exactly and how it will flow,” and “I don’t even know what songs the worship team is singing and if this will go together!” The hilarious part was that I was preparing to share about our Polyvagal Nervous System….the system responsible for protecting 
us from danger by thrusting us into Fight, Flight, or Freeze. God was undoubtedly chuckling as I bounced between peace, then panic, then paranoia, then back to panic as I headed to Buena Vista on Friday, November 1.
Well I am sure you don’t have to guess, but GOD SHOWED UP in a big way during our weekend and stole the show. He didn’t need my help, He didn’t need us to have another “focus and flow” session to figure out our scripts. He had the whole thing under control. As the initial talk unfolded Friday night and Becky Cleveland shared about re-introducing play, freedom, and curiosity back into our relationship with God, I knew He had it. With each new song being taught from the front by our incredible Gillian and Cara, I was further humbled at the words and the rhythm that was all God- 
ordained. I could feel my heart falling into rest as I realized how capable our God is and how He was able to be trusted with these 40 women for a weekend. I had been so convinced I needed to pull some more details of the talks together or have another excel spreadsheet to know it was going to be alright, but what God wanted to show me was that He would use so much more than the “speaker” or the “structure” to bring about His purposes. Being WITH Him and WITH Women was the gift we all needed this weekend. The worship, sharing, nighttime shenanigans, fantastic hearty meals with amazing fellowship, it was all just what my heart needed. I was in awe of how God worked IN SPITE of me and not because of, and loved watching Him use moments of vulnerable sharing, casual hikes, playfulness during games, and worship to fill our souls with Goodness and bring us to a place of settled attunement with our Abba Father.
I came away with the gift of REST and assurance that God knows what we need so much more than we know. Through songs and talks and time with amazing friends, new and old, I was blessed. I stopped for some fishing on the way home and took a photo that reflected the beauty of a God who is equally creative with mountains and the rivers and the hearts of women who show up.
Already looking forward to next year ladies!
Pam Zicker
